Keeping your cool
by The.Clown.That.Smiles
Summary: Paul never stops being infuriating.


_Disclaimer - Don't own nothing_

_For Redeyedcat_

_This should be more of an improvement than the last piece I did with these two. I hope it is. If it sucks, then do say, and I'll quit slash with these guys. _

* * *

''You like her, right?''

Paul bounced along next to Dwayne, a deep look of curiosity mired upon his face. ''I do. Although her hair is a topic that could be explored.''

Dwayne said nothing and Paul stopped with the jokes. ''Is it just me then?'' He looked towards him, more questions coming, and Dwayne slowly grew irritant. If he wasn't cracking ridiculous jokes, it was questions upon questions. All dumb ones too. Both were bad as another and the outcome always made him get pissed. Now, he just wanted Marko to appear into thin air and use his magic like he always did. The midget always stopped Paul in his tracks.

After the eighteenth question, Dwayne finally answered. ''If she stays out of my way, then there really isn't anything to say, Paul.''

Paul blinked and lent towards him. ''Not even a tiny, whiny, little bit?'' He pinched his fingers together. ''No tiny…whiny?''

Dwayne stopped, turning towards him. ''I don't give her a thought.''

A grin ever so slowly filled his lips, and his hand raked through his hair. ''No? Then why do you always look at her?'' Paul nudged him, earning a small flash in Dwayne's eyes. ''You want her for a fuck? I mean, personally, I can't see you wanting that. Your dick has got to be-''

''Not all of us want that when seeing a woman, Paul.'' Dwayne's eyes pierced his. ''Other than you of course.''

'Hey'' Paul pretended to look offended. ''I love chicks any way. Fuck them, eat them, or just talk with them. I love them still, and anyway…'' Paul popped up behind him. ''I'd rather have you.''

* * *

Paul sat grumbling to himself, for once, no grin visible. Marko slinked past him, a small snicker coming as his eyes went to the red patch on his cheek. Thumb came to mouth and a wide grin was given when Paul instantly gave the finger when they locked gazes. He turned away, moving towards where David sat.

''Still like her?''

Paul scowled slightly, hand coming out, closing around the wooden spoon. It was whacked hard across Dwayne's head, snapping straight in half. Arms crossed and that scowl deepened when the turned to look at him. Dwayne stared in silence, but a flash of amber eyes came.

A stick out of the tongue was given back and he turned away, scowl coming again when he locked eyes back with Marko. ''Laugh again, midget, and I'll shove this cigarette so far up your nose…hey!'' He swiftly turned back to Dwayne. ''Hands off''

Dwayne stared, hand tightening on the bag of weed. ''I fucking paid for half of this…''

''Yeah'' Paul snatched it from him. ''But since none of you fuck faces did shit, especially you.'' He prodded Dwayne in the chest. ''You ain't having shit all. Fuck off and get your own drugs.''

Dwayne gave him a dark look and he snatched the joint from behind his ear, earning a small yell of protest. Paul attempted to snatch it back, but a smack around the head stopped him. Eyes glinted, more when Dwayne's lips twitched ever so slightly. He turned, eyes locking with Marko's fake innocent face.

The joint he was smoking was shoved into Marko's face. ''Want to do that again, otherwise this will be straight up your fucking nose.'' A yank of the hair was given and Paul turned to face David, who watched them in silence. ''Unacceptable. Do fucking something. You always let the golden boy-'' Paul spat it sarcastically ''-Get away with everything. The cherub, the fucking midget, the golden boy in your eyes-''

''For once give it a rest.'' Dwayne muttered, eyes closing for a second.

''Give it a rest'' Paul yanked hard on his hair, pulling some strands away. ''Dick head.''

He was grabbed by the face. ''Pull my hair again, Paul and it will be this…'' Dwayne grabbed a pencil from down the side of the couch ''That will be shoved up your nose. Forget, Marko. It will be your brains on this pencil.''

David lent forwards. ''Both of you give it a rest. It's tiring and quite frankly-''

''You're like an old married couple'' Marko cut in, earning a glare from the two.

''Who asked for your opinion on shit.'' Paul pulled him down onto him, fist coming to his head. ''Let's talk about fucking opinions. Want to hear mine, glitter pixie?''

Marko did nothing but grin, and Paul yanked hard on his curls. ''If you could, I'd seriously tell you to take a look at yourself in the fucking mirror. You'd make the glitter town seem dull.''

''Glitter town?'' Dwayne turned to face him. ''What the hell is a glitter town?''

Paul looked down at Marko. ''Some shit of his I came across at Max's. Cartoon shit on a tape.''

Marko laughed. ''Actually that was yours, Paul. You were to fucking high to recall anything. It was you who picked that, not me. I was forced to watch it.''

A shrug came, a grin coming with it. ''Hey, cartoons are…alright…before you dis my shit, take a look at yourself, Marcus.''

''Not all of us are wannabe rock stars'' Dwayne muttered, earning another stick up from the finger by Paul.

''I've created children'' David muttered quietly. ''Now, we all know Marko looks…absolutely ridiculous, but don't forget Milo.''

Paul stopped and Marko pouted with a glare for a second at David.

''Milo. Fucking yeah, I remember that guy. Now that… '' Paul grinned. ''Is the freak of all freak'' He looked at Marko. ''You two would make an item''

Marko tilted his head. ''Who?''

Paul banged his fist on his head. ''For once get your head from out of the pile of glitter, or should I say Star's stuff. I know you put on her lipstick and clothes.''

Dwayne sighed. ''Paul, try to give a comment that is actually funny.''

''It wasn't supposed to be.'' Paul lent his head on his legs. ''Hello, my beautiful.'' He grinned when Dwayne looked down at him. ''You can dress me up anytime, anywhere, baby. I'll model for you'' He puckered his lips.'' Give me a smooch''

* * *

''Easy, tiger''

Hands came up, and Paul took a small step back, eyes glancing at the boy hidden behind Dwayne's back. An edgy, small laugh came past Paul's lips and his hand ran through his hair as he stared in a mixture of nerves and fear. Dwayne stood still, eyes trained on him. Brown eyes peeked up at him and Paul stared, unable to say anything to him.

''Well...'' He locked eyes with Dwayne. ''I ain't getting involved in this shit.''

He moved away, the furthest he could get, and the click of the lighter came, filling in the silence. He appeared over by the fountain, joint continuously being sucked on, but eyes weary and edgy as they stared. Dwayne watched his every move with calm, yet cautious eyes. There was no fun and games that night, not that Paul could form any right at that moment. He made sure to stay away, as it would only result in a fight and him getting his ass literally kicked. Though, as he moved around the fountain, his eyes went to the boy's. Both of their looks mirrored each others, curiosity.

'' I guess...''Paul stopped moving, glancing at Dwayne for a second, before looking back at the kid who moved a little from behind Dwayne's back. ''We're even and all that. Hey, now you've got some kid to look after and you're going to play daddy...I ain't playing no Mommy or shit just so you know, but...It won't be the sort when...Will we still fuck?''

A golden, rusty, trophy was thrown at his head and Paul dived behind the fountain when more was aimed towards him. ''Hey, don't go all saint on me now. So, what...The kid heard the word fuck, now he knows...'' He peeked from behind the fountain. ''You don't give a shit do you, squirt?

'You see...Dwayne, the big bad wolf here...'' A grin was flashed when a finger was given from Dwayne. ''Ain't he scary...He's just a cute and cuddly teddy bear really, a playful kitten who wants a ball of wool.

A laugh came and that grin widened. ''See, he don't give a shit, so cut the, ''I'm the bad-ass who will pone your ass if you try any shit''

* * *

''You're my bitch''

The scarf was thrown across the cave and a loud, booming, laugh came seconds later. Claws dug into flesh and brown eyes became amber.

''Who knew you were such a bad boy.'' Paul made a biting sound with his teeth, and then grinned. ''You know...I can snap these right...off.''

''Ah..''Paul blinked and looked down at his chest, seeing the blood run. ''Jesus, are you trying to eat my nipple?''

The response was a vicious growl, and then a bite of the other nipple. His teeth caught the end of it and he pulled, getting another yell from Paul. Amber eyes became angered, lustful, and vicious. The grin slipped back on like bees sticking to honey and Paul made a tsk, tsk, noise. He shook his head, pretending to try and break out of the handcuffs. They were suddenly snapped off by Dwayne and he was yanked up, before being thrown onto his knees in front of him. Claws dug down his back and fangs scraped up his neck.

''Oh, yeah, baby. Spank me, bitch. Spank me.'' He imitated a girly voice, earning a snarl off a hornier Dwayne. ''Hard, bitch.'' He looked behind his shoulder, a playful smile coming. ''More, more...You bad, bad, bad, boy.''

''Will you shut up for once''

''Oh, you love it. I'm all for the hand job, but are we going to fucky fucky now?''

* * *

So, once again, this is short. Why? Because I'm not good with slash, and writing things you try out new...it's better to try them out in small amounts as you can put more effort and care into it. Okay, so this was just humour mostly. I hope you found it funny as, sometimes, I think things will be humour, or dark, or whatever, and the readers don't seem to comment on it. Don't get me with angst. I always put angst and then it's not...I think it's sad but it's something entirely different. I'm sensitive like that, hehe. Anyway, so...I hope you liked it, and thought it was funny and hopefully better than the first one I did with these two. Yeah it did suck but, hey, it was my first time writing slash. Defense, yes, and practise makes perfect. Well, not perfect, but...I guess the title and summary are pretty much the same as the last piece I did with these two. Well, Paul is an annoying shit so, when I do more on the two, the titles will pretty much always be similar.


End file.
